Orientation to Station

Why are job orientations so painstakingly long? They’re always at least 90 minutes, when they could just hand you a packet and say “Read this and let us know if you have any questions,” and it would take 15 minutes, and everyone would be smiles. But instead, yesterday I got to hear the phrase “you guys” more times than I thought was possible over the course of FOUR HOURS. I mean really, do we all need to read out loud, together, as a group?

And let’s not forget the always amazing sexual harassment video. The unintentional hilarity was quickly undermined by the realization that these videos from 1993 have to keep being shown because people actually act like that. Any woman who’s worked in restaurants knows what I’m talking about. It’s just another reason for me to hate 50 year-old sales reps who think a cute 22 year-old with a future wants to nail a guy in a golf shirt.

If I want to end the orientations, I should probably stop being so lazy with my dreams, eh? On that note, Peter Kremidas and I just finished work on “Killer Tastes,” a short script we’ll be putting up at The Annoyance in late January. Stay tuned!

“there’s so much more left to do well I’m not young, but I’m not through”